How are you all doing? :)
Sooo I think this post is going to be a kind of: I just want to tell the world what (often very stupid:D) stuff I am doing and thinking all day :)
Who of you knows this kind of new single of Nickelback: "What are you waiting for"? I absolutely love this song at the moment and it gives me so much inspiration :) because what am I actually waiting forward? For better times without my ED to come? :) Of course this would be silly, so why not going higher? :) There is no reason holding anything back... :(
Also I am such a huuuuge fan of the song "I lived" by One Republic, because it also shows me, that as long as I am in this stage of my illness, I can´t say at the end of my life, that I actually lived :( spending the whole summer at home or in a clinic or not being able to meet with friends, travel or do other crazy stuff... :( Is my desire of thinness so worth that? :( NO DEFINITIVELY NOT
Soooo resulting to stuff like this I yeeeesterday officially made a scratch of my fear food list again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Say Goodbye to: Wiener Schnitzel :)
Yeeeah, the situation yesterday was like that: My grandma got 75 years and she runs a little german restaurant/pub :) she always cooks very very much and hearty :) so in my worst episode I would never ever have
touched anything of those things, but I planned to try it, because I wanted to show that I can become a normal girl again :) and I did it :) Oh you guuuys can´t imagine how happy I was afterwards :) Don´t know why, but it was like so tasty and worth eating it :) I momentaneously try to outwit myself a little bit by trying out many different things and I hoooope so much it gets better and easier by doing it :) Wish me luck :)
Another thing I did/am currently doing to motivate myself a little bit is, I rearranged my room :) Anyway I always thought I am not really such a creative and imaginative type of person, but by doing things like this I notice it makes me feel happy and helps me staying motivated in recovery :) So I decided to move the furniture a little bit and now I am able to look out of my window every morning when I wake up, which is really really nice and I like it :) I also wanted to rearrange my stuff, because so many perspectives in my room reminded me of my worst stage in ED :( at this time I always wanted to simply be alone in my room without anyone to talk to... :(I never want to have that again: Sooooooooooo my lovelies: Time for a change! LET IT HAPPEN! You won´t regret it :) believe me, I love the way my room looks now, completely different, but beautiful and perfect for my new me!
Should I post a picture of it? Would you be interested in the way it looks now? :)
I wish you all a lovely week and keep on eating your Nutella, never ever forget it!
(PS: I did decorate one of my shelves with an empty jar of Nutella to always remind me of my lifesaver) :)
xxx
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