I am a little bit in a split with myself at the moment and could really use your advice in a few ways:) I mean christmas was superduper wonderful and nice (by the way haahaa I got a new iphone 6, can't believe i really got it, but my old one wasn't quite working anymore, but I was sooooo surprised and it was so lovely of my parents;)) Soooo what special things did you get from the Christkind or Santa or whoever? ;) I would be so cuuurious to get to know about it;)
soooo but back to the actual topic, my problem.... So I momentaneously can deal with eating food at all really quite good, which means I accept that I have to eat all of my meals and I know how they have to look like... And I also know that I have to increase and show mooore;) yes this is okay as I said, buuut know I notice time by time that my character has become soooo egoistic and especially while eating I am such an annoying person who you don't actually and honestly want to spend any time with:( I know this sounds a bit weird but I am not so used to this characteristic of me, which I think first appeared with this stupid Miss Mager:( and whereas I can cope honestly good with eating at the one side (about what I am soooo unbelievably happy to be) but on the other I dislike myself for being so unfriendly to my family while eating and also afterwards or before... even though I know they only want the best for me:( so i don't know, why do I get so unfriendly and egoistic if it is about food????:) This is so annoying for me, because the hate and guilt after eating are not appearing at the moment any time, I can cut them out very well at the moment, but why am I saying such egoistic things? I know I have always been a person who wanted everybody to be satisfied and happy, and so why can't I simply behave right and make my loving ones happy and eat without any discussions about little food breccies I want to put away from my plate?
Puuuuh such a hard thing to always behave right and next to this eat enough to gain!!!!! ;) But well my cuuuuuties, I will never give up because of such discussions, because I am able to eat everything and so I will alsoo be able to beat Miss Mager and soooooo will you hoooooneys;)I wish you all the luck in the world
and omg nearly I forgot to ask, dooo you have any good intentions for what you want to achieve in 2015???;) because 2014 nearly is over, omgggggggggggg!!! Hard to believe right?=)
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| ouuuuur cuuute christmas village decoration ;) I simply enjoy the warming light of it =) |
Im no specialist or anything but maybe its because you get nervous or stressed when it comes to food. And if thats the case theres nothing to be ashamed of about that. I think being honest with your family would be very beneficial. Let them know how you feel or talk to one person in particular. Im sure they'll try to understand :) Maybe you don't even know why you feel the way you feel but I think talking to someone about it and getting some feedback, reaching out in general would be veery great for you I think :) If you still feel stressed maybe do breathing exercises or listen to music, make yourself more comfortable by, say, wrapping yourself in a blanket or holding a stuffed toy when you eat :) And when you feel guilty for treating your family like that just be honest with them and tell them how hard it is for you, Im sure they will offer support and it will be much more clear to them why you are acting the way you are. I hope some of this helps!!
ReplyDeleteOh thats so nice :) For Christmas some of the things I got "Yes "please" a book by Amy Poehler (she was also in the show "Parks and Recreation", if you haven seen that shoe you definitely should!!!), $$for savings from grandparents from both sides and great grandparents, apple cranberry spread I think it was, I haven't tried it yet but am looking forward to trying it along with something. Any ideas what it would be good on/with? No clue how it must taste, probably like cranberry sauce with apple? Haha! ;)
Hope you are doing ok1 :)
Oh by the way this is Olivia ;)
DeleteWooooow *_* thaaaaank you so muuuch for such an helpful, wise and lovely post ;) I love the style of writing you have :) it always makes me smile so much and I am very very sorry I haven´t replied on your aaaamazingly sweet email you sent me :) I will as fast as possible, I PROMISE :) it is so helpful for me what tips you share with me, I can´t believe how much time you invest and this really makes me soooooooo lucky and happy, and I think you are aaaaaabsolutely right with everything you say :-*
ReplyDeleteIt probably really is the best to have an honest talk with my loved ones and tell them my feelings (I am sure you all know how I love to babble about my feelings :D) I hope they don´t get bored or enerved by it, but this is really what I need to do :) talking and also writing/blogging help me to cope with my feelings afterwards :) I also need as you say some music for letting the anxiety go while eating by relaxing and calming down by listening to it :) and it is also true that being honest with them and excision for my behaving is probably the best thing I can do for not making me and them feel guilty for my behavior :) thaaaanks so much for those really really helpful tips ;)) and taking time for writing them down <3
Ohhhh what lovely presents *_* especially money you can always have a use of right? ;) hahaaa
Noo I sadly haven´t heard of this show or the book, but after reading it, you will definitively have to tell me how it was and if you liked it :-*
Aaaw this sounds yummiiiii I think and I am sure you will like it ;) also never heard of it, but is it like jam or jelly? =) then I would try it out with some fresh warm toast probably ;) I think this would go very well, or what do you think? =) I alsooo hope so much you are well and enjoy the beginning of 2015 ;) it will be our year, I am sure :) xxx
Nawww!! :) Oh really don't rush or anything!! I myself can be very bad on answering emails, but mostly text messages, haha!! I either forget or am too lazy. Im sure they will be very supportive and don't worry about them being 'annoyed;, your family wants to help you :)
DeleteSo far Ive gotten through a little bit of it but for now because of all the schoolwork Im taking a break from it. Buuut I definitely would recommend the book and the show!! They're both so funny and heartwarming!! I think thats an awesome idea, I actually think Ill do that right now as Im thinking of what I should have for dinner and theres not much food at home anyway. Thank you!!! You are just so sweet ^_^ I know you can recover as well!!!
Olivia
Ooooooh that´s so nice ;) *_* I am really really sorry, but I manage it as soon as possible :) I simply want to have enough time for properly answering it, because it is written so lovely and I don´t want to just sloppy a short answer =) Yeees, I know that they are always here for me in every stage of recovery and I am so thankful even if I sometimes behave like a grumpy or something :)
DeleteOOoooooh then I am definitively looking forward to read something about it!!!!!!
Hahaaaa this is so cute :D then I aaaaaabsolutely hope it tasted well?????? ;) You definitively have to tell me about it, I am so curiouuuuus :) is it typical american or russian spread or nothing of both?
Aaaaw thaaanks so much Olivia :) makes me so happy ;) I believe so much in us:)
Sending you a warm-hug xxx Ange
Awww, thata sonswet of you ^_^
DeleteI tried it with toast as you suggested and it was so yummy!! It was more like an apple sauce texture :) hmmm... I guess anerican because its cranberry+apple sayce which are both traditional america
Sorry, didnt finish the comment, haha!!
Delete...n. I do so too!! I know you can do this :)
Sending you lots of hugs!! :)